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- Respected Neighbor
- Pawtucket, RI
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| Hundreds mourn Marine Pfc. Coutu |
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on 02-26-2010 23:42 
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By JON BAKER
PAWTUCKET --- Seconds after the funeral had ended, Pfc. Jeff DaSilva – dressed in his National Guard uniform – stood in the basement of the St. Teresa of the Child Jesus Church early Friday afternoon and explained his sadness about saying goodbye to a beloved pal. “We used to hang out, go to parties, talk in the hallways,” stated DaSilva, a former Tolman High classmate, of U.S. Marine Corps Pfc. Rifleman Kyle Joseph Coutu, who was killed in Afghanistan on Feb. 17, two days after his 20th birthday.
“I was close to him because we had so many mutual friends; he was always such a happy guy,” he added. “If I was down in the dumps, he knew how to cheer me up. He just had that vibe where everyone wanted to be around him. People knew he would make them feel special, wanted.
“You know, I'm getting shipped out to Afghanistan in June, and I don't mind saying, I'm scared. Still, I have my orders; that's why I signed up in the first place. I know Kyle, and I know he'd be proud of me. I'm going to help other people, just like he did.”
Helping others.
Call that the mantra served during a beautifully-scripted, full military funeral Mass held for Coutu. Attendees included not only hundreds of family members (and the Coutu clan is huge), friends and fellow soldiers but also Gov. Donald Carcieri; U.S. Sens. Jack Reed and Sheldon Whitehouse; Attorney General Patrick Lynch; State Sen. Edward O'Neill; and Mayor James E. Doyle, to name a few.
So many flocked to the church, Fr. Joe Paquette's staff had prepared the basement, where mourners could view the memorial service held above on a 54-inch TV screen.
As all waited patiently, pallbearers marched Coutu's casket, draped in an American flag, up the stairs to the main entrance, then inside. Across Newport Avenue stood Pawtucket Police Chief George Kelley III and his troops, as well as members of the Patriot Guard holding American flags, one with a yellow banner reading “Don't Tread On Me.”
Police cruisers – from, in order, Pawtucket, Warwick, East Providence, Cumberland, Charlestown and the R.I. State Police – lined up on an angle, facing the church's front doors. Civilians, some holding umbrellas, stood shaking in the snow-rain mix, awaiting the motorcade.
(Tolman students, some waving flags, were allowed to leave after lunch to line Exchange Street. They did so to issue a final “So long” and “Go Tigers!” to their fallen alumnus).
“It was amazing,” said THS junior Kayla Williams, who sobbed quietly in mom Lori Ritcey's arms. “I don't think it could've gone any better than that. So many people adored Kyle. He was a one-of-a-kind guy who could light up the room with his smile. It was infectious.
“You know, I didn't cry as much as I thought I would today, because I'd look into the sky, and I knew he was looking down, flashing that smile,” she added. “He told me, 'Don't be sad! I'm here in a better place. I'll see you again.' He'll always be with me in my heart.”
During his homily – just after first cousin Arianna Coutu's first reading from Ecclesiastes 3 and fellow cousin Cory Durkin's second from John 14: 1-6 – Fr. Paquette stated he too had questions about Kyle's death.
“Why? Why Kyle? Why so young? Why so tragic? There are no answers, but one thing we are sure of is that God loves us!” he told the congregation. “We live in a world that is not perfect in love. God gives us a free will to make choices, and very often wrong choices are made.
“Wars throughout the years often occur as a result of anger, hatred, power, territory, greed, retaliation, control and even religion. All of these are contrary to God's love. God gave us the commandment to love Him and to love your neighbor as yourself.”
“The gospel is 'We will be judged on the love we have given!” he added. “Today, we celebrate a young man you all knew and loved, Kyle Joseph Coutu, a young man who loved much and gave much. Martin Luther King Jr. once said, 'It's not the length of your life, but the quality of life that you lived that is important.”
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Paquette admitted he had heard hundreds of stories about Coutu, a stellar THS football player for four years, and one who also partook in wrestling, hockey and outdoor track and field. Those came from folks in grocery stores, local gyms, church, schools, even a gas station.
“(They were) stories of how he opened his heart to everyone, how he always saw the good in people,” he noted. “It didn't matter if they were young or old, what color they were, or religion, challenged, or gay, poor or rich. He made you feel important. If you had a tough day, Kyle could cheer you.
“If you were depressed, he'd make you smile. If you were lost and confused, he would not only show you the way, Kyle would walk with you. Kyle had a great self-image and loved the person God made him. He was full of life, spirit and a little bit of the devil!”
(That statement drew chuckles from those who knew him best).
“As I listened to all the stories of this wonderful young man, I wondered to myself, 'Where did he get all this?'” he added. “It didn't take me long to discover where – that woman he called Mom and that man he called Pepere, and all his wonderful family. What a tribute to Kyle's family!”
Paquette mentioned a young soldier named Scott visited him Monday night, and he gave the priest a whole new image of war, beyond the bombs and gunfire.
“(He said) 'The poor, the children, families, the hungry and scared, loving and looking for any help they could get. That's the reason I want to go back for a second term,” Paquette said. “Kyle always wanted to be a Marine, and – knowing the kind of man he was, with the kind of heart God gave him – I presume this was his dream on how he could help people by serving his country.
“Kyle, you are a hero, not only for the way you died, but by the way you lived!”
Coutu's godparents, Greg and Mary Coutu, delivered the eulogy, and it didn't take long for tears to flow.
“Where do I begin? I'm not going to lie. I am mad,” said “Uncle Greg” emphatically. “Not at any one person, but because he had his whole life in front of him. I'm mad because of what my sister (Melissa) is going through … God had bigger plans for that man. I wanted him to follow in my footsteps. He would've made a great policeman.
“You know, I was his uncle. He always called me 'Uncle Greg,' never just 'Greg,'” he continued. “I feel really good inside, because my wife (Mary) is a really good cook, and she made him a heckuva meal before he was deployed (in January). I was able to give him a big hug in the driveway, and I told him I loved him. He said he loved me, too.
“When we spent time together, I tried to remind him of the values we taught him – including myself, his mother, his nana and pepere. How always to give a firm handshake, and look into someone's eyes when he spoke to them, open the door for his girlfriend … Melissa, you really worked hard to keep him in line. He was polite, respectful and loved. I didn't realize how much until I went to Tolman High on Sunday.
“Everything came to him. His name is synonymous with Tolman High School … Kyle was the complete package. He not only dreamed big, but made his dreams come true.”
“Aunt Mary” Coutu opened her soliloquy like this – “Kyle's looking down right now and saying, 'What a party!'” – then spoke of Kyle's fiancee, Jacqueline DaSilva. She revealed that, before he asked Jackie to marry him this past Thanksgiving Day, he first requested her mother's permission.
She also indicated how Coutu had to fight for everything he ever achieved, how he worked so hard to become the athlete he was, and how he worked to better his grades to join the Marines, his dream since childhood.
“On Feb. 17, God asked for a hero, and Kyle answered the call,” she said, crying softly.
As best friend and USMC Pfc. Peter Lang closed the mass with the Marine's Prayer, the sun's rays beamed through the basement windows.
It couldn't have been a more fitting cue from the heavens.
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