Statesman Stratus Story

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Only green that Stratus sees is moola
John Kelso
Friday, November 13, 2003

The times sure are a-changin' over at Stratus Properties, aren't they?

Hey, don't be surprised if you walk into the company office and find folks slapping patchouli oil on one another, belting out a few rounds of ''Kumbaya'' and worshipping a salamander.

Sure, Stratus is one of the largest developers of environmentally sensitive land over the Edwards Aquifer. But suddenly, the company has turned into a bunch of enviro-freaks.

Used to be that for Stratus, formerly known as FM Properties, a real estate subsidiary of Freeport-McMoRan (or to some, Freeport-McMoRon), green was that wad of bills they stuffed in their wallets every time they paved over a deer pellet to put up a home.

But these days, Stratus will tell you that green means something else altogether. Green is saving the birds and the bees and the flowers and the trees from those evildoers at Wal-Mart.

Have stranger bedfellows ever found themselves drooling on the same pillow? Stratus teamed up with City Council member and former songbird-coddling, development-bashing Austin Chronicle columnist Daryl Slusher and activist Mike Blizzard to keep Wal-Mart from putting in one of its supercenters at MoPac Boulevard (Loop 1) and Slaughter Lane.

Stratus paid Blizzard $22,500 to crank out the verbiage to defeat the proposed Wal-Mart. Meanwhile, Stratus kept Slusher up to speed on the campaign by e-mail.

I figure the reason Stratus wanted Wal-Mart out of there has nothing to do with impervious cover. Stratus wants to build an H-E-B grocery store less than a mile away from the site of the now-dead Wal-Mart project. After all, H-E-B sells a lot of the same stuff Wal-Mart does, and who needs the competition?

At first I thought it was unfair for Stratus to pay $22,500 to Blizzard without giving Slusher $500 for a new suit. Remember that Panhandle-looking linoleum lizard thing he used to wear when he entered city politics?

But as it turns out, Slusher doesn't need a new suit. ''See, I've gotten much better dressed since I was running in '94 with the itchy suit,'' Slusher said. In fact, he admitted, he has six or seven suits, some of them even from upscale clothiers. ''I've got some from Capra & Cavelli, and some from Second Looks,'' he said.

What is this world coming to? First, you've got Stratus pretending to be Don Henley. Then you've got Slusher primping at Jefferson Square. Next thing you know, Slusher will be making an appearance on ''Queer Eye for the Green Guy.''

Anyway, Stratus CEO Beau Armstrong says a Wal-Mart vs. H-E-B scenario had nothing to do with Stratus driving off Wal-Mart.

I got two words for you: Yeah, sure. But there are some moves Stratus could make to convince the public that the company cares about the planet.

Armstrong could start wearing a turban and a large button on his lapel that says, ''Hi there. I'm the Maharishi. How about a foot massage?''

And the next time they build a development, instead of standard homes, they could put in yurts.

John Kelso's column appears on Sundays, Tuesdays and Fridays. Contact him at (512) 445-3606 or jkelso@statesman.com.
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