A Japanese company (Toyota) and an American company (Ford) decided to have a canoe race on the Missouri River. Both teams practised long and hard to reach their peak performance before the race.
On the big day, the Japanese won by a mile.
The Americans, very discouraged and confused, decided to investigate the reason for the crushing defeat. A team made up of senior managers was formed to investigate and recommend appropriate action.
Their conclusion was that the Japanese had 8 people rowing and 1 person steering, while the American team had 7 people steering and 2 people rowing, but that the American boat was based on "time-tested" 30 year old technology.
Feeling a deeper study was in order, American management hired a consulting company and paid them a large amount of money for a second opinion. They advised, of course, that too many people were steering the boat, while not enough people were rowing, and that the design of the boat could use some modifications.
Not sure of how to utilize that information, but wanting to prevent another loss to the Japanese, the rowing team's management structure was totally reorganized to 4 navigation supervisors, 2 direction-setting superintendents and 1 assistant superintendent to mon
itor and report on the efforts of the rowers. They also painted the boat.
Ford also implemented a new performance system that would give the two people rowing the boat greater incentive to work harder. It was called the Rowing Team Quality First Program, with meetings, dinners and free pens for the rowers. They were also given new t-shirts the same colour as the boat, then a second set that corrected the logo to "Quantity is Job One" in order to appease Wall Street.
There was some discussion of getting new oars, boats and other equipment, and giving bonuses and extra vacation days for practices. The rowers' pension program was trimmed to "equal the competition" and some of the resultant savings were channeled into morale-boosting communications and teamwork posters.
The next year the Japanese won by two miles.
Humiliated, the American management fired the trainer, laid off one rower, halted development of a new canoe, bought cheaper plastic oars, and canceled all other investments for new equipment. Pleased with the swift and insighful actions taken by management, Ford's executives felt it only fair that the money saved be distributed to themselves.
Meanwhile, Ford's executives flew to Washington to seek government funding, pointing out that Ameri
can pride was at stake and the rowing set-back was only temporary. They used the money to hire additional rowing consultants, provide incentives to a reorganized steering & navigation management team, cut training time and pay to the remaining rower, and coat the old boat's hull with K-Y jelly to reduce drag.
The next year, try as he might, the lone designated rower was unable to even finish the race, so he was laid off for unacceptable performance, all canoe equipment was sold and the next yearʼs racing team was out-sourced to India.
________________________________________________________________
____________________________
Here's something to think about:
FORD has spent the last thirty years moving its factories out of the US, claiming they can't make money paying American wages and benefits.
TOYOTA, on the other hand, has spent the last thirty years building more than a dozen plants inside the US.
The last quarter's results:
- TOYOTA makes $4 billion in profits while Ford racked up $9 billion in losses
- FORD folks are still scratching their heads... and collecting bonuses.
IF THIS WEREN'T TRUE, IT MIGHT BE FUNNY